ladies of the GOP

If you live in the US, you'd have to live under a rock to not be fully aware that there is an election coming up in 2012. I'm especially tired of the glut of political snarkiness that has been going on in the GOP. If you are a Republican...you have to be scratching your head thinking, "Really? This is the best we could come up with"? It's a sad state of affairs when your choices are between a leech and a letch, and I'll let you figure out which one is which.

Anyway...I've been looking alot at the potential first-ladies. As Jim Carrey so aptly put it, "Behind every man is a woman rolling her eyes". So true. So...kind of thinking about how they have a subtle way...or not so subtle way...(yes Callista, I'm talking about you) influence on their candidate husbands. Is there a possibility that a man could appear or not appear more presidential according to how his wife appears? And if so, when does 'said wife' go from plain jane to "hey here's the number of a stylist go get yourself tweaked and start looking like a first lady"?

In case you think I'm totally off my meds, take a look at Michelle Obama when she was a mere senator's wife.

Big dif right? There have been multiple articles written about her eyebrows. One such discussion pontificated that her "angry eyebrows" could cost Obama the election. Seriously people? A brow adjustment is the reason he got elected?

Well, enough of that...you get where I'm going. So here are the GOP wives final four. It will be interesting to watch the making of a first lady as it gets closer to a GOP front runner being confirmed and chosen.

So, here we have Ann Romney. My guess is that they will take away all her Talbot catalogues and call in the hair squad...who will immediately take her shorter and darker in color. I'm predicting her hairstyle will change to something like this.

Kate Capshaw

And then there was Carol Paul...

Oh dear. She could be the poster child for JC Penney. Someone please 911 Barbara Bush.

Karen Santorum. If Coldwater Creek and J. Jill had a love child...this is what it would look like. I'm also predicting a shorter hairstyle and one that will allow her natural curl to 'be free'.

Blythe Danner

All of the above would do well to buy some classic basics...like a wrap dress, an LBD, great trench coat, black kitten heel pumps and a variety of accessories like scarves and necklaces. Wardrobe items that are somewhat tailored and non-descript, but could be accessorized to make them look different.

Styled for Karen Santorum, Carol Paul and Anne Romney by Miss Bea Heyvin

And then we have...dum dum dum dummmmmmmm...

Callista Gingrich...who I think think's she's the one running for office. Step away from the podium Callista.

No seriously sweetie...we just need you to take a couple steps back so you're not in the shot.

No really. Just back up. All of the other candidates wives stand in the background to focus all the attention on their spouse.

Now don't get in a snit about it. People aren't here to see you, they're here to see Newt.

O good grief...she's like Hillary on steroids.

Anyway...I'm not sure what's going on with her hair or clothing. Both are so severe that she looks like she's going to crack any second. Unlike the other wives who are a bit too casual, I think Callista needs to take some Xanax and loosen up a bit.

She should go back to her old hairstyle. Look how much prettier it was...soft and feminine as opposed to the helmet head thing she's doning now.

Okay...we get it. You have a suit in every color. blah blah blah... Which just accentuates this "tighter-than-a-skeeter's-arse-in-a-nose-dive" type of public persona. I would love to see her in some less structured silhouettes. Ruffles, pleated or flowing skirts...still tailored, but visually softer and more feminine. More Jackie-O and less Cruella Deville.

Styled for Callista Gingrich by Miss Bea Heyvin

Whether you win or lose, in the end, it's always about who has the cutest shoes. Miss Bea